Fiction writing for my Creative Writing Final

We got a prompt for Creative Writing and were told to make it more suspenseful. This is what I came up with. Enjoy!


Across the valley from us, the mountains were the color of dirty sewer water. Usually the sun would have brightened the scenery, but today the clouds hung heavy and low, threatening to suffocate the dilapidated village below us. I had chosen this village because of its solitariness; no one would realize these humans were missing.

I turned and looked at my group. I almost felt like I was babysitting; these brutes knew nothing. They kept fighting with each other and they were making an insane amount of noise. I was a bit concerned that the unfortunate humans in the village below would hear us. But I was reassured by the fact that we would take care of them before they would even think to scream.

I turned when I heard a noise from down below. Someone was emerging from one of the dwellings. I could hear her bare feet squishing in the mud. Her dress was filthy and the wooden bucket she carried was half rotted. I was right – no one would be missed.

I spun back around to my wards. My rag tag group’s eyes snapped to me; they sensed my vehemence. They were hungry and their eyes took on a monstrous look. I could see their muscles anticipating the attack we were about to perform. With a sharp jerk of my hand, and a baring of my deadly teeth, we moved down into the valley.